Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Teenage Son Syndrome


Communicating with my teenage son is so frustrating. Somewhere between 8th grade and the end of his freshman year he became alien to me. The boy who use to make me laugh so hard, who would sneak up and scare me, who would ask me to come hear the music to a song he was learning on the guitar, who wouldn't leave or go to sleep at night without a hug and an "I Love You", and the boy who when he was younger always sat by my side when we watched TV. Where'd he go? Now I have to sneak up behind him on the computer to steal a hug. I have to coax him to answer simple questions of which most of the time I get a "I don't care", "I don't know", or a grunt. When I call thru his, now locked, bedroom door "Goodnight, I love you." I usually get only a "goodnight." This was different with my teenage daughter. We sure did butt heads. I got lots of angry looks and hurtful words. But we always made up, and she hardly ever went to sleep, even at 17, without having a hug and saying "Goodnight, Mommy. I love you."
My son can eat and not gain a pound. I buy him whole milk and believe me, he is the only one that can drink that and not worry about the fat content! I buy him his favorite things, like strawberry syrup for his milk and vanilla pepsi-'cause he hates all the diet stuff I normally buy. If he wants something I go out of my way to do it, like ordering flowers for a girlfriend, washing his clothes and not drying them too much, or even starting his car on a cold morning. I long so much for appreciation. My husband and younger son (the one who still hugs me) call him "The Prince".
I am literally ecstatic when I see him smile. There are times he trusts me with little pieces of his life, girlfriend info, college/future plans, funny things that happen at school, etc. These are the times I cling to. When he sets down to watch TV with us I am happy he is just in the room, even if it is across the room now. I am sad for the short days that are left with my teenage son at home for he is junior in highschool. One day he will not be eating dinner with us as often, sitting at the computer a room away, playing his guitar in his room, watching "King of Queens" with me. Someday all too soon he will have moved on to another era in his life. As my daughter did and I struggled so hard letting go! I must.. I will.. and I am so thankful for every stage of my childrens' life. I am thankful every day God gives us on this earth together!
Kev's favorite song is "Simple Man" by Lynard Skynard:
"Mama told me when I was young, come sit by me my only son, and listen closely to what I say, and if you do this it will help you some sunny day, ah yah...to be a simple man, oh take your time don't live to fast, troubles will come and they will pass,oh find a woman, ooh baby, you'll find love and don't forget son there is someone up above. And be a simple kind of man..."

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